– Sophie, Washington

There once was a little girl who smiled brightly like the sun and felt like she was lost. She felt this way because no matter what path she chose, it led to destruction and chaos in her little mind. This little girl began to grow. By the time she was not yet 13 she realized that she was completely alone (or so she thought). She believed that the world would not let her be happy. Let her shine, as she was called to do. She stopped showing her beautiful smile and began to talk less when the conversation came to her. As she quieted, the other children began to notice and began to avoid the little girl because they didn’t understand her. Of course at that time she only blamed herself for being different and being ignored in such an important time in her life.

Of course at that time she only blamed herself for being different and being ignored in such an important time in her life.

Many people that she loved disappeared in this time of growth, and it made her trust in the world recede further. She became depressed and people noticed. Her mother had worked so hard to put sunshine in her eyes but the grey skies of sadness always seemed to come back. Her father never noticed the raindrops on her cheeks, perhaps because the grey skies already clouded his mind. And she thought that he didn’t care about her storm of emotions and started to give up. She didn’t know where to go and so she just stopped. Stopped everything, stopped eating, sleeping, crying, laughing. She was nothing but wind. But the storm kept blowing at her, trying to lift her from the earth and take her elsewhere. But deep roots in mother earth kept her down. No matter how hard she chopped or cut at her roots to let her be free, they kept her where she needed to be. The storm subsided after too many long nights and she believed that it was a trick, that the clouds would come back. And occasionally they did. But all she had to do was take a look at her roots and see that even the strongest wind can’t rip out the connections between her and the cruel but beautiful world.

But all she had to do was take a look at her roots and see that even the strongest wind can’t rip out the connections between her and the cruel but beautiful world.

That girl was me. There is still a little girl with raindrops on her cheeks inside of me, and she will stay there forever. But instead of being frightened of clouds that cover my eyes, I decided to put the raindrops behind me and look further. Through the clouds of depression, anxiety, and many more adverse problems. I began to see a light, one so bright I didn’t believe my eyes. It was a splurge of colors and sweet memories. Because behind this mass of clouds I found  a rainbow.

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